Life and Death

Today I attended a visitation for my cousins son. Chad was 24 and a good kid from what I have heard. He was messed up with drugs and died of a herroin overdose. I use to babysit Chad and his sister. Actually, that was the last I had seen him...when he was little. He has a 4 you DD and I can't even imagine how difficult her life will be w/o her Daddy there. My heart weeps for her and for all of his family.

Like I said we weren't close at all. My Dad has 10 siblings and from them 52 grandkids and God knows how many great-grandchildren are floating around out there! Geez. So getting together is tough and we try for the annual reunions but the crowds get smaller and smaller as my dad's siblings are starting to die. It makes me sad. I see my cousins and remember when my grandparents were alive and all the parties we had, man those were the days. Running around at grandma's house and not having a care in the world...my life has always been pretty good.

I see my cousins and see the resemblances btwn them and myself. I see them and see their deceased parents and my heart aches. This was my favorite uncle's grandson. My Uncle Chub as he was called was a teddy bear. Chub was a simple man and never asked for anything. I see his face in his son and his grandson and great grandaughter. Now Chad is with his grandpa and that makes me sad but also makes me smile b/c I see Uncle Chubs happy face.

What was really special about tonight was that my dad and 8 of my 9 siblings all attended this visitation...we were the only cousins there. I am proud of my family's compassion. We are good people. We talked about old times and smiled at the memories. It was nice. I wish we got together more often.