Compassion
Sometimes I think I am a heartless person. I just get SO tired of giving my compassion to the same people and sometimes I don't think they deserve it anymore. I have other people I'd rather feel compassion for and pray for and many times I feel like some people play the victim and want us to feel compassion for them and pray for them when they are NOT making an effort to change the circumstances!
I have a large family and a few members are quite dramatic and I am fed up! I'm sorry your 18 YO son is a screw up but after being threatened to either clean up or go to jail and the kid still doesn't do it and is kicked out of 2 rehabs, I'm suppose to feel sorry for him? Um, no thanks! I'm done! I have other friends, family and strangers that I care about and want them to find the happiness that they deserve and are working towards. Why oh why must I waste my energy on some of these people? I want to feel bad for him and my sister but I can't. I'm done! So I get the angry looks and the questions of why I'm so crabby. Well you know, maybe if people would f#cking grow up and take responsibility for the things they have done, this world would be a better place!
I ran out of compassion for my brother and SIL many years ago! OMW they screwed over my parents so many times and so many different ways that it isn't even funny! Do I love them, well I think so. I do love my bro and after all these years of heartache and pain from my SIL I am starting to love her. I will not go out of my way for them but as I see them changing due to her pregnancy (still questioning that one but maybe God gave them a baby to save them? I hope so) and reaching out to us, I feel myself caring more and more for them. I kind of like it. I know what they did is wrong and we can't go back and undo it. In a way it is even too late for an apology. My parents are ok with it and my mom is thrilled they are back in our lives so who am I to rock the boat? As long as they keep making the effort, I will continue to love and support them. Maybe I'm not so bad afterall?
I just can't stand people who play the victim when they are really to blame for what has happened to them. I mean give me a break, I don't have time for you to repeatedly F up your life and come running to me whining and making me feel like shit. Grow up and suck it up!
Yes, I know I am heartless but only to those who force me to feel that way. I have lots of people with real needs on my prayer list and those are the people that I will always have time and love and compassion for. I hope I always show that to them and don't get caught up in the other ugly stuff.
I have a large family and a few members are quite dramatic and I am fed up! I'm sorry your 18 YO son is a screw up but after being threatened to either clean up or go to jail and the kid still doesn't do it and is kicked out of 2 rehabs, I'm suppose to feel sorry for him? Um, no thanks! I'm done! I have other friends, family and strangers that I care about and want them to find the happiness that they deserve and are working towards. Why oh why must I waste my energy on some of these people? I want to feel bad for him and my sister but I can't. I'm done! So I get the angry looks and the questions of why I'm so crabby. Well you know, maybe if people would f#cking grow up and take responsibility for the things they have done, this world would be a better place!
I ran out of compassion for my brother and SIL many years ago! OMW they screwed over my parents so many times and so many different ways that it isn't even funny! Do I love them, well I think so. I do love my bro and after all these years of heartache and pain from my SIL I am starting to love her. I will not go out of my way for them but as I see them changing due to her pregnancy (still questioning that one but maybe God gave them a baby to save them? I hope so) and reaching out to us, I feel myself caring more and more for them. I kind of like it. I know what they did is wrong and we can't go back and undo it. In a way it is even too late for an apology. My parents are ok with it and my mom is thrilled they are back in our lives so who am I to rock the boat? As long as they keep making the effort, I will continue to love and support them. Maybe I'm not so bad afterall?
I just can't stand people who play the victim when they are really to blame for what has happened to them. I mean give me a break, I don't have time for you to repeatedly F up your life and come running to me whining and making me feel like shit. Grow up and suck it up!
Yes, I know I am heartless but only to those who force me to feel that way. I have lots of people with real needs on my prayer list and those are the people that I will always have time and love and compassion for. I hope I always show that to them and don't get caught up in the other ugly stuff.
posted by Momma Jen at 5:54 AM
1 Comments:
I don't think you are hearless at all! Especially after going back and reading your posts from last year.
I think you just don't like wasting your time, and I don't blame you;-)
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